Carrick joins Wilcox under the bus after Manchester United’s latest night in crisis | Max Rushden

Bruno Fernandes followed Lisandro Martínez in revolt after his team’s 4-1 defeat to Como in the Champions League

You have to credit Manchester United. Your local rivals have turned the Premier League into an almost meaningless farce. We are questioning the validity of anything we’ve seen over the past 20 years; wondering how many goals Erling Haaland will get in the Championship. We are looking at the league table from second position down and wishing we’d invested in inflatable bananas a month ago.

And yet here comes the Old Trafford machine: from players to the captain to the manager to the director of football, to the director of the director of football, to a minority owner who feels the UK is being “colonised by immigrants”, to debt-leveraging majority owners who take vast sums out of the club and are collectively saying hold my Ineos-sponsored high-performance wellness immune boost smoothie.

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